A few weeks ago, I heard a sermon titled, “the Voice”. The pastor gave “5 characteristics of a stranger’s voice” and I realized this list is also “5 ways to know he’s NOT the right one for you”. The “stranger” in the scripture reminds me of how some men treat women.
John 10:4-5 New International Version (NIV)
4 When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice. 5 But they will never follow a stranger; in fact, they will run away from him because they do not recognize a stranger’s voice.”
Recently, I wrote a post I called, “What do you do when God is quiet?” The day after I published it, we went to visit our youngest daughter. We visited a mega-church close to her. I’m not a mega-church kinda’ girl, we have always attended a small church in a small town in Texas. So, I didn’t get the whole mega-church thing.
After about 2 minutes in one of five services at Community Bible Church in San Antonio, we understood. That huge sanctuary was packed. The music was phenomenal and the worship and sermon was amazing. I could feel the power of the Holy Spirit go through me like electricity. I wasn’t alone, my daughter leaned over and said, “This place is amazing!”
The sermon title was, “The Competing Voice”. It was part of a series of sermons on the voice of God. God’s voice has been on my mind lately. I don’t believe in coincidences, only God-incidences. When God wants you to understand something about Him He will repeat it in many ways.
It was crazy how packed that place was and how the crowd was on the edge of their seats to hear the message. People are hungry to know God and hear Him. In fact, my most popular post so far has been, “3 Ways to Hear the Voice of God”. People are searching and seeking God like never before.
I’ve heard somewhere when banks teach their employees to distinguish between real currencies and counterfeit they only study the real money. They don’t ever show them counterfeit money. That is how we are to learn to know God’s voice. We are to only study His Word and seek Him alone. When we know the Truth of God, then we will know someone who is NOT from God. We will recognize the “stranger” when he comes around us.
That being said, when there is a disease in our body, it’s important to recognize the symptoms of the disease to diagnose the problem and gain healing. To do that in this world, we need to know the symptoms and characteristics of the enemy in order to avoid him.
At Community Bible Church, Dr. Ed Newton taught from John 10:3-5, 16. Among the ways to know the shepherd and discern God’s voice, he presented 5 characteristics of the “stranger’s competing voice” in John 10:5 so that we can beware of the enemy we have in this world. You can hear Dr. Newton’s sermon here to gain further insight.
This is a brief part of the sermon, but I wanted to share it with you. The list of characteristics of the stranger came from Dr. Newton’s sermon but the “5 ways to know he’s not the one” underneath are my observations.
John 10:5 New International Version (NIV) 5 But they will never follow a stranger; in fact, they will run away from him because they do not recognize a stranger’s voice.”
This is the part that stood out to me. These are the 5 characteristics of a stranger’s voice that Dr. Newton gave and the,
5 Ways To Know He’s NOT The Right One For You
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The stranger’s voice is Counterfeit.
Satan will always try to counterfeit what God does. He prowls around “like a roaring lion” (1 Peter 5:8) to deceive people. The enemy is a counterfeit of Jesus who is the “Lion of Judah” (Rev. 5:5). Satan does this over and over in scripture. He will try to deceive and keep things secret. The enemy will try to avoid the truth. He is sneaky.
This will be a red flag with the wrong guy. Like Satan, he will deceive and lie to you. This may not be evident at first but you will see this as a pattern with him and the Bible says, he is a liar and the truth is not in him (John 8:44). He won’t change unless God makes him into a new creation through a relationship with Christ. You can’t change him!
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The stranger’s voice is Condemning.
The enemy will NOT build you up or edify you but will tear you down. It might be passive aggressive ways so that others don’t realize what he is doing to you, but you do and it hurts. The wrong man will be underhanded and will try to make you believe you are unlovable.
This is also a lie because God calls you His Beloved. (Song of Songs 6:33) The Creator of the Universe loves you. You are precious to Him and loved.
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The stranger’s voice is Condescending.
The wrong guy will talk down to you and hurt you by knowing your weaknesses. He will whisper hateful things to you and make you feel bad about yourself. He will be critical about everything that you are and those that you love.
Unlike God, who treasures you and calls you “Chosen”. (1 Thes. 1:4)
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The stranger’s voice is Competing.
The stranger will try to compete with the truth of God. He will bring up false facts and try to confuse you. Satan is jealous of God. The enemy will try to separate you from your family and friends.
This may be the first sign you will notice in the wrong guy. He will be self centered and selfish. When he isn’t right for you, he will separate you from others who might recognize him and warn you about him. The stranger does not want the family to succeed or the church. He is a separator and destroyer.
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The stranger’s voice is Comparing.
This is a biggie in today’s society. The enemy places ideas in your head to make you think you are never enough. With social media and advertising, we have a false sense of reality. Be who God created you to be.
The wrong man for you will always be comparing you to others. You will never be enough for him. God says you are worthy and perfect in His sight. (2 Thes. 1:5)
Society has young women accepting a treatment from men God never intended for them and also could be why marriages are failing at an alarming rate. God created women to be loved and treasured.
He created marriage to be a picture of Jesus and His Bride. Jesus freely and unselfishly laid down His life for His Bride (the Church or all Believers) in order for her to be with Him forever. Look for a man who treats you the way Jesus treated His Bride.
Has someone been counterfeit with you, condemning, condescending, competing, or comparing you to others? Has someone made you feel less that God created you to be? This is the stranger’s voice Jesus mentions in John 10:5. None of that is from God or part of His plan for you.
You are a daughter of the King! You are treasured and loved by the great I AM. God created you for a purpose. He will strengthen you and fight for you. If a person tells you different, get him out of your life. Get away from him and seek Christ. If you are drawing close to Jesus, the right man will find you there because He will be seeking Jesus also.
If a man does not love you the way Jesus loves His Bride, he is a stranger. Listen to the Shepherd’s voice and follow Him.
Jesus is NEVER counterfeit, condemning, condescending, competing, or comparing. If someone treats you in these ways he is not from Christ and he is not for you. Resist him.
James 4:7
Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
Remember who you are and WHOSE you are. Don’t listen to the enemy’s evil hisses in your ear. He is a liar. Resist him and he will flee.
You are loved, treasured and created for a good purpose, a God purpose. Don’t settle for less.
Learn to recognize these 5 ways to know he’s NOT the right one for you and seek to hear the Shepherd’s voice.
I love you sister,
New International Version (NIV)
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