It was about 73 degrees outside; sunny with just a whisper of a breeze blowing the whisps of blonde hair across my face that had come loose from my ponytail. I had pulled it up in a hurry to get outside to watch my daughters play. My babies, ages 9 and 5, were running back and forth from the horse trough showing me the tadpoles they had caught at the pond with their dad. Time blew through the trees in my yard…time and trees.
Their happy squeals echoed through the trees as they played and had their little girl tiffs over who owned the biggest tadpole. Off in the pasture, I heard the little cottonwood tree flutter its leaves in the wind as if all of creation celebrated the glory of God in the beauty of the day.
Then my cell phone rang…
I open my eyes and it is no longer 1999 but 2018. It is 73 degrees outside; sunny with just a whisper of a breeze that is pulling the strands of hair free from my ponytail. The hair has soft gray mixed in the blonde now. The squeals and tiffs of the past are quiet and wonderful memories. My girls are no longer little girls but grown and living off on their own. They are happy, productive, strong, beautiful, young women. Which is what we wanted for them.
Behind me, I hear the steady crrrunch…crrruuunch…as my precious husband is cracking pecans he had picked up earlier. These little flashbacks of the past seemed so real in my mind’s eye. Treasures I had stored up in my heart to ponder later in quiet times.
Some of the pictures our minds play for us are wonderful jewels and yet some excruciatingly painful. They can come out of nowhere and feel as though someone punched you in the heart. They become like a familiar friend because you have taken them out and rubbed them raw going over and over them so many times. When life is quiet you pull them out and play them…and play them…and play them…again and again trying to make sense of the past and the time that has gone by so quickly.
How did time go by and where did it go?
Time goes so slowly at first and then gains speed as you age to the point that it seems you can’t even breathe trying to keep up with it all. Beauty, proms, dating, college, love, fun, weddings, jobs, dreams, dreams realized, birth, laughter, birth again, friends, moves, churches, new homes, Baptisms, grandparents’ funerals, kids’ football games and pep rallies, school plays, graduations, pets, parents aging, children leaving, children’s weddings, grandchildren…time…glorious time, miraculous time passing, ever passing.
As I stood outside with my husband, watching my Border Collie chase squirrels, my kitten trying to chase her, and my little longhaired Chihuahua begging for pecans as my husband shelled them, I praised God for all of it…for this time right now. I praised God even for the pain and illnesses of the past because they have brought me closer to God as I learned to depend on His grace to make it through each day.
God has been the constant in my life.
In my younger days, I didn’t get to linger in my prayer room like I do now but we spent time in the hurriedness of it all. He knew I was busy, so He would lean back and watch and laugh at my girls’ antics with me and wait. My God helped me when I wasn’t sure what to do with all of their problems or my problems for that matter. I praised Him for always being there no matter what, waiting for us to slow down and make time for Him.
Reveling in the beauty of the day and musing on details of the past had made me a little sad. Just then the wind stilled for a minute. It grew incredibly quiet. And I heard it…off in the pasture; the old cottonwood tree clapped its big old leaves loudly in the wind. There was no other tree making any noise, just the cottonwood but it was making quite the ruckus, creating a commotion to get my attention away from the past. I just smiled at a private joke.
It seemed as though God was trying to bring me out of my melancholy mood.
He knows my loves. He made one of my favorite scriptures come to life just for me. You know there are never any coincidences. Just God incidences…
“The trees of the field clapped their hands”.
Isaiah 55:12
“You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and hills will burst into song before you, and the trees of the field will clap their hands.”
My God’s beautiful poetry mixed with promises and smiles as time blew through the trees in my yard.
Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2019 Shawna Novak
